The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
