Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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