At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
