What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
