I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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