Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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