He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
