Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
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