If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
