Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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