i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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