Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i love accidental penises.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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