I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
