A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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