just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
