i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
