Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
