i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
