They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize