She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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