I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
