It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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