i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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