last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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