Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Randomize
