singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
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