No awkward lesbian experiences without me
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
