yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
