I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
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Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
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Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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