And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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