I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
