He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
