didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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