apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
