So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
