I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
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