similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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