Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
the room spins SO much faster in panama
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
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