I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
