HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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