I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
