after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
