I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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