i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
