we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize