i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
