am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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