Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You made out with two different species that night
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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