Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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