Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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