fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
